


Oh My Blue Home

by jashin_senpai



Series: I Promise You, You'll Never Be Alone [2]
Category: Lego Ninjago
Genre: Angst, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, Minor Character Death, Potentially Dubious Consent, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-12
Updated: 2017-04-12
Packaged: 2018-10-17 21:03:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10602195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jashin_senpai/pseuds/jashin_senpai
Summary: I got a very sweet request from LawofTalosRules234 to write her OC Jacob into the Distractions 'verse. And it occurred to me that this was the perfect opportunity to write about a noodle incident of sorts that takes place between Part II and III that I was not planning to go into great detail about, but on further reflection, is actually pretty important.Due warning, it's a little spoiler-y for the upcoming final chapter of Distractions.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LawofTalosrules234](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LawofTalosrules234/gifts).



The bouncer that night wasn’t one of the usual faces, which meant that Jacob had to fork over the full cover charge to get in.

This would have been a total pain in the ass even on a regular night, but money had been tight ever since he walked out on his agency. “Freelance model with no clients” was basically synonymous with “unemployed”.

Maybe he could get it written off as a work-related expense. Being seen was the most important thing in his occupation after all – and being seen meant frequenting all the hottest bars and clubs in town.

Thankfully the place was seriously buzzing – it meant tonight probably wouldn’t be a total waste of money. Jacob knew he should really be mingling and trying to network, but his eye kept getting drawn to a guy sitting over in one of the corner booths.

He was surrounded by a crowd of laughing hangers-on, but he was quietly slumped over his drink, gazing listlessly out at the club. He looked exhausted, lost, and more than a little despondent.  

Jacob didn’t like to think of himself as some kind of misery tourist, but he had to admit, he found fucked-up people compelling somehow. He liked to hang out with them and listen to them pontificate about their problems, potentially sleep with them once or twice, and when he’d heard the sob story he’d be on his merry way. Most of them were grateful to have someone actually willing to _listen_ to them for once, anyway. He liked to think of it as a public service – like a free therapist kinda deal. The gratification of knowing he was helping people was probably why he did it in the first place.

Or maybe it just made him feel better about his own life.

Whatever.

He sidled over to where miserable guy was sitting.

“Hey there” he said softly. Well, as softly as one could be when trying to yell over some DJ’s lame remix. Was the inclusion of Axel F supposed to be a reference to 1985 or 2005? He really couldn’t tell which one would be more passé. Maybe it was some kind of irony thing.

Miserable guy just kind of stared at him. His pupils were _really_ blown.

“You look like you could use someone to talk to.”

“I- you want a drink?” miserable guy said. He grabbed a half-empty bottle off the table and poured two shots. His hands were shaking pretty bad, so Jacob reached over and gently pulled the bottle away from him to set it back on the table. He didn’t really want broken glass everywhere.

“Here. Drink up” the guy said, passing one of the shot glasses over. Jacob was already on his fourth tonight, but he was hardly one to turn down free alcohol.

“Cheers” he said, tilting the glass toward miserable guy in a vague salute before swigging it down easily.

Miserable guy stared at the other shot blankly.

“Drink up?” Jacob suggested helpfully. He wondered if the guy would notice if he nicked it for himself.

“Mmm. No, I. Kai would be mad.” He slid the second glass over to Jacob.

“Ta, then” he replied, disposing of it as quickly as he had the first.

Up close, miserable guy looked kind of familiar. Not in a we’ve-shagged-before kind of way, or even a you-work-at-that-one-café kind of way – more in a I’ve-seen-you-on-TV way. Jacob supposed it wasn’t that surprising, given the club they were in.

“I’m Jacob, by the way” he said.

“Oh. Right. I’m Jay” miserable guy replied.

“Oooh, see how similar our names are? I knew I felt a connection between us!”

Jay stared at him some more, but this time his gaze was weirdly focussed.

“A connection” he repeated slowly.

Jacob grinned. “Yeah, a connection. So tell me, what’s a cute guy like you looking so sad for?”

“They all hate me” Jay said.

“I’m sure that’s not true” Jacob replied.

“No, they do. They hate me because I’m clingy, and weak, and annoying.” His voice wobbled.

“I don’t think you’re any of those things” Jacob said soothingly. “And I’m sure I’m not the only one.”

“Kai doesn’t know he hates me yet, but he will.” Jay giggled, a little maniacally. “He’ll hate me because I’m a fuckup and I broke my promise.”

 “What promise?” Jacob asked, but Jay had apparently switched gears and was now getting pretty up-close and personal.

“You have, hehe. You have nice eyes.” He reached out to touch the skin just below his left eyeball, and then dragged his fingers down Jacob’s face until they reached his mouth.

Jacob shrugged, deciding that this was an acceptable change of tune, and pulled Jay closer.

***

The bed he woke up in the next morning was definitely on the nicer end of the one night stand scale.

Jacob just lay there for a few moments, savouring the thick mattress and luxurious silk sheets – miles better than the shitty futon in his own apartment. The guy beside him had the covers pulled right over his head, but he was presumably still sleeping because he kept making faint, snuffly little noises. Cuter and less obnoxious than snoring, but still kind of annoying after a while.

Eventually he decided he couldn’t stand it any longer and got up. He was still wearing his shirt from the night before, but everything else was scattered haphazardly on the floor of the bedroom.

He winced a little as he pulled yesterday’s underwear back on. It was something of an occupational hazard for him, but he’d never gotten over how gross it was. Chris wouldn’t have cared, probably. He was always mocking Jacob for his fastidious tendencies.

He was itching to go home and get into some clean clothes, but he figured he might as well take advantage of his host a little longer and take this opportunity to score a free breakfast. He slipped quietly out of the room, and was about to head downstairs when his phone started buzzing angrily in his pocket.

Ducking quickly into the bathroom and closing the door behind him, he pulled his phone out and thumbed at it to accept the call without bothering to check the caller ID. There was only one person who would dare to ring him this early.

“And where the fuck were you last night?” Milly inquired, without even bothering to say hello.

“Good morning, sweetheart. I’m great, thanks for asking” he replied pointedly, peering curiously at his surroundings. The bathroom was huge, with a classy black and white tiled floor and a dauntingly high-tech shower with about a bajillion buttons. He was willing to bet it came with a sound system and atmospheric lighting.

“Sammy said she saw you at Avalon” she said, accusingly.

“If you already knew where I was, why bother with the interrogation?” he asked mildly. The shower totally _did_ have atmospheric lighting. He was equal parts impressed and appalled.

“Don’t be a smartass, kid. Need I remind you that you’re about to be homeless if you can’t secure a gig soon?”

He rolled his eyes, even though she wouldn’t be able to see it. “I was there to network” he said. He rifled nosily through the cabinets underneath the ornate stone-topped sink, but there was nothing inside bar some fancy hand soap and a small baggie of pills stashed behind the piping. This was only a guest bathroom then – he supposed all the bedrooms were bound to have ensuites, in a place like this.

“Bullshit. Sam said you spent the whole time macking on some guy.”

“He’s my new sugar daddy” he said airily.

“You are _so_ full of it.”

He sent her a selfie, a quick snap of himself making a thumbs up gesture with the lavish bathroom behind him.

“You’re just jealous of my new digs” he said.

“I would be – if I thought there was any chance of you sticking around long enough to enjoy them. After you run out on this guy – or he kicks you out, whichever comes first – you should come over. I’ve got a couple of contacts from old clients who might be able to help you out.”

“Thanks” he said, unexpectedly touched. She didn’t really belong to him - Milly had been Chris’, back then, and she’d stuck around with him for some reason afterwards. She was still probably the closest thing he had to a friend these days.

“Don’t mention it” she said, and ended the call as abruptly as she’d started it.

He re-pocketed his phone and resumed his quest for breakfast – only to stop dead in his tracks when he entered the kitchen and found a guy with spiky brown hair leaning against the bar table eating cereal in a way that suggested that he very unquestionably lived here.

The guy turned slowly to glare at him. “And who the fuck are _you_?” he asked.

Jacob could only gape at him. Even with the swollen and bruised cheekbone and the split lip, he was unmistakably recognisable as Kai Smith – one of the legendary heroes who had saved the city multiple times.

Which meant that the other guy – the one he’d hooked up with – must have been Jay _Walker_.

He must have been waaay more out of it than he’d thought last night, to not pick that up immediately.

“Oh fuck” he muttered to himself, “I am an _idiot_.”

Kai’s scowl deepened. “I didn’t ask what you were, I asked _who_ you were.”

“I, um” he said, gesturing vaguely upstairs, “I’m a. Friend. Of Jay’s.”

“Friend” Kai repeated, managing to make it sound more like a synonym for “motherfucker”.

Ordinarily, if someone had spoken to him like that, Jacob would have kicked the ass of the guy in question. He was not, however, in the practice of starting fights with _ninja_. Especially not ninja directing homicidal glares toward him.

“I was just. Leaving” he said, backing away slightly.

“So early?” came a soft voice from behind him. He turned to see Jay standing in the doorway, blinking sleepily, hair still mussed from the covers. When he saw Kai, however, his eyes widened and he gasped.

“Kai!” he said, lurching forward to clutch at him. He brushed right past Jacob, as though he wasn’t even there. “Your cheek – you should get some ice on it, here, let me – ”

“It’s fine” Kai said, gently prying Jay’s hands off him. “I’ve had worse.”

“Still!” Jay said, insistently.

Kai sighed. “I’ll go put some arnica on it or something, okay?” he said.

“You need to be more careful with your face” Jay said reproachfully, and Kai gave him a soft grunt in return that may or may not have been acquiescence as he left the kitchen.

“So last night was, nice. Really nice” Jay said. He was smiling, but his hands were twisting anxiously at the material of his shirt. He was kind of ghastly in the morning light, pale and greasy with deep, bruiselike shadows ringing his eyes, but Jacob could see how he had the potential to be good-looking.

“It was good for me too, babe” Jacob replied, feeling trapped and trying to play it off as a joke.

Jay just smiled wider, his tense fingers stilling. “That’s- wow. Great! So I was wondering if later today-”

“Can’t” Jacob cut him off, before he could get any further, “got stuff to do.”

Jay’s face fell, tragically, and Jacob couldn’t help but feel as though he’d kicked a puppy or something.

“Sorry?” he offered.

“No, it’s fine, I was just going to ask if you wanted to come to this stupid photoshoot thing I have later, it was a terrible idea anyway, as if you’d wanna hang around for something like that, I just thought since you were trying to find contacts in the modelling industry, but forget I said anything, it’s totally fine-”

“Whoah, slow down there for a sec” Jacob said, cutting off Jay’s rambling.

 _How does he even know about the modelling thing? Did I tell him last night?_ he wondered. He shrugged it off – it was hardly the most pressing issue at hand.

He frowned as he considered the implications of what he was contemplating. Jay was obviously kind of, well. Unstable. It was definitely a bad idea, getting any deeper than this. Then he thought back to the conversation he’d had with Milly earlier and it solidified his resolution.

He reached out and gently took one of Jay’s hands in his own.

“Hey” he said softly, “I’m sorry about what I said before. I didn’t think you would actually want me to stick around.”

“But I do” Jay said, hopefully.

“Then yeah. I’ll go wherever you want. Just let me head home and get changed first.”

“I’ll get my driver to pick you up” Jay said, squeezing his hand tightly like it was a lifeline.

***

He really hadn’t expected Kai to be at the shoot as well, but apparently he was something of a permanent fixture at Jay’s side. The assistant makeup artist had told him in conspiratorial tones that Jay’s manager approved of this because none of them thought Jay should be left alone for any extended period of time.

So there he was, glaring at Jacob over the table as Jay was busy being molded into various poses beneath the glaring studio lights, and making this ten thousand times more awkward than it already was.

“He doesn’t do this often” he said suddenly.

“What, photoshoots?” Jacob replied flippantly.

“Bringing guys home. That’s not something he does.”

“So?”

“This isn’t some quick fling for him. So if that’s what you’re expecting, or you’re trying to take advantage of him-”

“Ah, I see. You’re jealous?”

Kai’s fists clenched. His knuckles were red and swollen, and Jacob was suddenly certain that those rumours about his involvement in illegal underground fighting rings were one hundred percent true.

“I’ve spent the last two years trying my damdest to keep him from falling apart, and I’m not going to let you fuck it all up” he hissed savagely.

Jacob narrowed his eyes at him. “Maybe I’m serious about this too” he said, and let the rest of his retort hang unsaid in the air between them – _you call this ‘not falling apart’?_

Kai scoffed. “As if I’m supposed to believe that you aren’t just some gold digger.”

Jacob couldn’t stop himself from blurting childishly, “Oh come on, you’ve seen my apartment building!”

Kai had not, in fact, seen his real apartment building, which was a cockroach-infested shitheap. He’d given Jay the address of some swanky uptown place this morning instead, and waited outside to be picked up. He thought it might add a layer to the totally-not-taking-advantage-of-your-money-and-fame persona he was attempting.

It looked as though Kai had seen right through him, however. Time to break out the big guns, then.

“Is it really so hard to believe someone would like Jay just for who he is?” he asked, blinking innocently.

Kai clenched his teeth furiously, but he didn’t say anything more, which Jacob counted as a victory.

When Jay was finished, he went and fussed over him for a bit, playing the supportive boyfriend role. Jay then excused himself to the bathroom and Kai trailed after him surreptitiously, which gave Jacob the perfect opportunity to flirt with the director of the shoot and pass his number out to several potential clients.

He was in a relatively good mood when Jay’s driver dropped him back at the address he’d given earlier with the promise of a dinner date the following evening, even though he still had to walk the four blocks back to his own apartment.

***

In the weeks following, Jacob managed to score more modelling gigs than he’d ever had in his life – including the time he’d been signed with the agency.

He withdrew the money as soon as it was transferred to his account and kept it stashed in various places around the apartment – in vases, behind the contents of his dusty bookshelf, inside his mattress. Even after all this time, he hadn’t managed to rid himself of the habit of making sure he could drop everything and take off at a moment’s notice.

He stayed over at Jay’s place a lot, figuring that if he was going to be spending copious amounts of time with him anyway, he might as well take advantage of his awesome apartment.

It wasn’t like spending time with him was particularly _awful_ , anyway. The sex was good – Jay was responsive and pretty eager to please, and he made some nice noises, especially when he was high.

Some of the other stuff wasn’t bad either. They had similarly ostentatious taste in clothing, so they went shopping together a lot. Jay insisted on paying for everything, which Jacob would normally have at least protested, but the way he just threw everything on his tab without even checking the price tags made the money much less real and easy to ignore. Jay blew through money like it was water, anyway.

Jacob suspected it was the product of a kid who’d grown up with nothing and suddenly found himself with more cash than he knew what to do with. He never spoke about his past, but the being one of the famous heroes of Ninjago did not make for a low profile, and the junkyard thing was common knowledge.

The two of them had more in common than Jacob cared to admit, and it scared him a little.

In another life they could have been real friends, he thought. Maybe more than friends, without any of this bullshit in the way. Maybe he would have enjoyed it then.

As it was, he gritted his teeth through pleasantries and fucked Jay into the mattress, and then went to the bathroom to glare at his reflection and tell himself that the sick feeling in his stomach was not guilt.

“Why me?” he blurted out one night, while Jay was halfway through unbuttoning his jeans.

“Huh?” Jay replied. His delicately freckled cheeks were flushed and his mouth was open and wet, and Jacob wanted nothing more than to cup his head gently in his hands and pull him down, make him slide open the zipper of his jeans with his teeth while he petted his hair and praised him for being _such_ a good boy.

Then he caught sight of Jay’s disconcertingly blank stare – eerily familiar – and remembered how fucked up this situation really was.

“I just- What are you getting out of this?” he asked.

“I love you” Jay said, like it was just that simple.

“You don’t- it doesn’t- _why_?” he snapped. He almost wanted to slap Jay, to make him wake the fuck up.

“Y-you said” Jay stuttered, “you said we had a connection.” There was more than a hint of fear transforming his previously vacant expression, like a child who was about to have their security blanket snatched away from them.

Jacob felt a wave of nausea flood through him. He shoved Jay off him and stumbled off the bed, re-buttoning his pants.

“I fucking- I can’t do this. I’m sorry” he said.

He didn’t miss the way Jay’s face crumpled as he started to sob, still kneeling on the floor beside the bed, as he lurched from the bedroom.

Kai was sprawled on the couch downstairs, watching basketball on the massive widescreen television. His expression hardened as soon as he saw Jacob’s face.

“Something happened” he said flatly.

“Piss off” Jacob snarled, snatching his coat from the chair where he’d discarded it earlier.

Jay stumbled down the stairs behind him. “Please don’t go” he said hoarsely, choking back tears. “I’ll do anything. Just don’t leave me.”

Kai leapt up from the sofa. “What did you do to him?” he shouted at Jacob. “What the fuck did you do?”

Jacob laughed humourlessly. “Nothing” he said.

He hailed a cab as soon as he got outside and went straight to Milly’s place. She took one look at him when she opened the door and ushered him inside, grabbing a bottle of whiskey from the pantry.

“Well?” she said, and he blurted out the whole messed up story, while taking several swigs of whiskey straight from the bottle.

She didn’t say anything when he was done, just gave him a long, lingering stare. Finally, she set her glass of wine down and said “It sounds like you care about him. A lot.” And then, “You can’t alter the past. Chris isn’t coming back.”

“This has nothing to do with Chris” he snapped, pressing the cool glass of the whiskey bottle against his forehead.

“You’ll sleep here tonight, and then you’re going to go back to him tomorrow morning.” He glared at her, and she continued. “You can end your ‘relationship’ if you want, but you owe him some kind of closure. If you don’t give him that, you’ll regret it.”

He didn’t bother to point out that he already regretted a lot more than that. She knew, anyway.

***

Against his better judgement, he found himself dithering outside Jay’s apartment the next day. He still had his key, but it felt like he had forfeited his permission to use it. On the other hand, if he rang the doorbell, whoever answered would probably slam the door in his face. Or maybe no one would bother answering at all.

Eventually he just slid his key into the lock, figuring that he could at least use the pretext of needing to return it.

Kai was waiting for him on the other side of the door, with a face like thunder.

“I knew you’d come crawling back” he spat. He held up a small plastic bag with half a dozen white pills inside. “Forget something?”

Jacob frowned in confusion. “I came back for closure. I figured Jay deserved that much.”

“And to get your stash, yeah, I know.”

“Kai” Jacob said, apprehension creeping over him. “Those really aren’t mine.”

“Then who the fuck else would they belong to?”

Jacob stared at him. “You- I thought you knew! _How can you not know_?”

“What don’t I know?” Kai shouted, clenching his fists so hard his knuckles turned white.

“They’re Jay’s! Fucking- everybody can see that, except you!”

 Kai shook his head violently. “They can’t be his.”

“Are you _kidding me_? Are you actually this fucking blind?”

“They’re not his. He promised me. He promised he’d stop. So they must be yours” Kai said, his voice eerily calm. He held the bag out to Jacob. “Take them.”

Jacob shook his head.

“ _Take them_ ” Kai said insistently. His voice cracked a little at the end.

“I’m sorry, Kai.”

Kai started crying then, loud, ugly sobbing. Jacob retreated a few steps uncomfortably.

“Why? Why would he break his promise like that?”

“It doesn’t work that way. You can’t just- stop. Your body doesn’t let you.”

Kai glared at him. “This is your fault, isn’t it? You gave them to him, so he’d be too fucked up to realise you were taking advantage of him.”

Jacob flinched at that. “I know you think I’m a real piece of shit” he said, eyes stinging. “And maybe you’re not wrong. But I would _never_ do something like that.”

“How am I supposed to believe that?” Kai said. He shook his head. “I don’t know what to believe about anything anymore. I need to go clear my head- I can’t be here anymore.”

“You can’t just leave!” Jacob cried, panicked. “What about Jay? He’ll- he won’t take it well. You know that.”

Kai snorted, humourlessly. “You’re his boyfriend, aren’t you? You take care of him.”

 _I was going to leave him_ , Jacob wanted to say. _He needs you more than he needs me. You’ll regret doing this._

The door slammed behind him before he could get the words out.

He stood there in the silent apartment for a few long minutes. Milly’s words – _you care about him –_ echoed through his mind.

He crept up the stairs as quietly as he could, picturing Jay lying unconscious in his room like Sleeping Beauty. Beautiful. Cursed.

However, when he reached his room, Jay was nowhere to be found. Jacob nearly had a heart attack, but then he noticed the sound of running water emanating from behind the closed door of the ensuite.

He knocked softly, and then pushed open the door. Jay was sitting hunched over in the shower, shirtless but still wearing his pyjama bottoms.

“I’m fine Kai, I already told you” he said without raising his head from where it was resting on his knees, his voice muffled by his arms.

“It’s me” Jacob said.

Jay stiffened, and he glanced up. His eyes were red. “No it isn’t” he muttered stubbornly.

Jacob couldn’t help smiling a little, fondly. “Yes, it is.” He went and sat down next to Jay in the shower, his clothes getting soaked within seconds.

“Your clothes are getting wet” Jay told him seriously.

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“You’re sorry your clothes are getting wet?”

“Nah.” He rested his head against Jay’s shoulder.

“You came back.”

“I did.”

“Did Kai give you a hard time?”

“Ah. Sort of.”

Jay made a soft, questioning noise.

“He, um. Do you remember the night we met?”

Jay wrinkled his nose. “Sort of. ‘S a bit blurry, if I’m honest.”

“You said you’d broken a promise” he said carefully.

He felt Jay tense beside him. “He’s gone, isn’t he?” he asked. “I knew this would happen eventually.” He didn’t sound sad, just resigned.

“I think he’ll be back” Jacob said, a useless attempt at reassurance. “Like I came back.”

“You only came back to say goodbye, didn’t you? But then Kai left. So now you feel like you have to stay” Jay said, matter-of-factly.

“Of course not” Jacob said, but it sounded lame, even to his own ears. He tugged at Jay’s arm. “Come on. We should get out of the shower.”

Jay let him manoeuvre him back to the bedroom and strip off his soaking pants. He raised his arms obediently to allow Jacob to dress him in a set of fresh pyjamas.

“You think I’m taking this surprisingly well” Jay said informatively.

That was exactly what Jacob had been thinking, but he didn’t admit it. What he said was, “You know him better than I do. I think you trust him to come back.”

Jay laughed. “But I don’t” he said. He lay back on the bed, on top of the covers, and closed his eyes. “Tell me a story?” he asked, feeling for Jacob’s hand and tugging him down beside him.

Jacob lay down obediently beside him. “Once upon a time” he began, “there were two boys. The oldest one said he could still remember when they had a mother, but all the youngest one could remember was being alone.

They lived in a boy’s home in a very small town, far away from any big cities. The home had a TV that the boys were allowed to watch for a few hours after dinner. They all liked watching the news, because there were a lot of stories about a group of very brave and strong ninja – not much older than most of the boys themselves – who protected people. All of the boys at the home wanted to be just like the ninja. They would pull their shirts over their heads and hit each other with cardboard weapons, pretending to be heroes.”

Jay quirked his lips a little. “Is this a true story?” he asked.

“Shhh, you’ll interrupt my train of thought” Jacob replied. “So. This home the boys lived in. It wasn’t always the nicest place. The younger boy didn’t notice for a long time, because the older one protected him, but the people in charge liked to… hurt the boys there sometimes.”

Jay didn’t comment this time, but he squeezed Jacob’s hand a little tighter.

“It wasn’t that bad at first, but the older boy made the people in charge angry a lot. He was always talking back to them and breaking the rules. Silly things, like sneaking out the window in the middle of the night to sleep on the roof, just to prove that he could, I think. And they already had a grudge against him, because he wouldn’t let them anywhere alone with his brother.

He was always covered in bruises and stuff, and people were starting to ask questions so they kept him home from school. He’d sneak out of the house instead, and he made friends with these older guys. They were involved in some shady business, and they’d pay him to run errands, do deliveries, stuff like that. He saved the money – kept it stuffed in his mattress. He showed the younger one where it was hidden, just in case. And he said the two of them were going to leave the home one day and run away.

The younger one didn’t want to leave, because he was scared. So the older one told him they were going to go to Ninjago City, where the ninja lived. The younger one was excited about that, because he thought that he might have a chance of meeting them one day if he lived in the city.

They almost had enough money saved, but then the people in charge of the home found out that the older boy had been sneaking out. They asked him where the money was, but he wouldn’t tell them, so they broke his arm. They found the money in the mattress anyway, and took it all.

The younger boy cried, but the older boy laughed and said it served him right for hiding it all in the same place, and that he wouldn’t be so stupid next time. Then he got serious and said that they couldn’t stay at the home anymore, because the people in charge would be watching them more closely from now on, and because he couldn’t protect the younger boy with his arm broken. They had to leave that night, while the people in charge were still distracted with the money.

The older boy had some cash on him from the delivery he’d done earlier that day. It wasn’t enough to get to the city, but it was enough to get them to the next town over. So they packed everything they had in their school backpacks and ran down to the train station and caught the very last train. The younger boy was upset that they didn’t make it all the way, but the older boy said that while it wasn’t exactly what they dreamed of, at least it was one step closer.”

He glanced over at Jay, who still had his eyes closed. “The end” he added, just in case Jay hadn’t realised the story was finished.

Jay was quiet for a long time – so quiet that Jacob thought he’d fallen asleep. Then he asked suddenly, “Did the boys ever make it to the city?”

Jacob looked over at the window, where the twinkling lights of the metropolis spread out in all directions, so bright that they obscured the stars. “Yeah” he said.

***

Jay’s manager was eyeballing him over the top of her designer sunglasses.

“It pains me to say this” she said, “but I can’t help but notice that Jay has been exceedingly… shall we say, _placid_ the past few days.”

“Um. Yes.”

“I think you and I both know that this is not, generally speaking, a good sign.”

“Um. No.”

“Did anything happen that I should know about?”

He fidgeted a little. “We had a fight. But I think we made up? I don’t know if he’s actually over it, or just pretending to be. Also, Kai kind of took off the other night.”

She sighed. “I need you to keep an eye on him.”

“I was already” he said defensively. Talking to her pissed him off. If she knew Jay was so fucked up, why didn’t she send him to rehab or something?

“Bad publicity” she said.

“Huh?”

“You’re wondering why I don’t insist he goes in for treatment. It’s because it would kill his image.”

“I thought there was no such thing as bad publicity” he said sarcastically.

“Jay’s entire career is marketed on the back of his previous claim to fame as a hero. Without his squeaky-clean, family-friendly image, he’ll be nothing.”

He laughed. “Boy, you sure picked the wrong guy for that.”

She smiled. “He’s a very good actor when he needs to be. We just need to make sure he doesn’t crash and burn publicly.”

“That’s fucked up” he told her.

“That’s showbiz” she replied, patting his arm condescendingly.

He grimaced. Jay deserved better than this. Better than her, better than Jacob, better than all of them.

After filming wrapped up for the day, he took Jay out for an early diner at some trendy new restaurant down at the marina (well, figuratively speaking – Jay was still footing the bill).

They talked about carefully neutral topics. Jay hadn’t said a word about Kai since he’d taken off, like he was pretending he’d never existed, and Jacob had decided to follow his lead.

Halfway through eating, Jay developed a sudden and severe nosebleed. Jacob hauled him off to the bathroom and mopped him up.

“Hey look, you managed to keep all the blood off my shirt!” Jay said as Jacob was busy washing his hands. “My hero.”

“You’re welcome” he said.

He turned to exit the bathroom, but Jay stopped him

“No need to leave so soon! Let’s have some fun” he purred, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

“This is a public bathroom” Jacob protested weakly. _And you’re not exactly in a great state of mind_ , he thought.

He didn’t want a repeat of the other night though, so he let Jay suck him off, leaning against the sink and praying none of the other restaurant patrons would come in.

When they got back to the apartment, Jay dragged him up to the private rooftop pool, even though the sun was already going down and there were dark clouds overhead threatening rain.

“There’s a thunderstorm on the way” Jay told him, floating peacefully and gazing up at the sky as Jacob treaded water next to him. “It should hit later tonight.”

“You can predict the weather now?” Jacob asked, semi-serious.

“The electricity” Jay replied, gesturing at the roiling clouds above them. “I can feel it.”

Jacob shifted uncomfortably, not at all happy with the prospect of being in a large body of water on top of a very tall building with lightning on the way.

“We should get out” he said.

Jay turned his head to look at him. “Coward” he said, smugly.

“Yeah, I’m a fucking coward, congratulations. Get out” he snapped, more sharply than he’d meant to.

Jay looked at him in surprise, but he did slide over to the side of the pool and pull himself out.

Downstairs, they showered together in dead silence. Jacob left Jay sprawled on his bed and went down to the kitchen to fix himself a drink.

“Hey Jay, you want me to bring you anything?” he called, but Jay didn’t reply.

With a growing sense of trepidation, he made his way up the stairs.

“Jay?”

He heard an awful choking noise from behind Jay’s bedroom door, and his blood turned to ice. He flung open the door to find Jay seizing horribly on the bed.

 _Not again_ , he thought hysterically, _oh God, not again_.

His cell was downstairs – too far away. He upturned Jay’s bag and dumped its contents on the bed, scrabbling frantically for his phone. Little white pills scattered haphazardly in all directions, bouncing on the carpet and rolling under the furniture.

He finally located Jay’s cell, tucked in the pocket of the jacket he’d been wearing earlier. He swiped at it wildly, silently blessing Jay for being such a sweet, naïve, trusting creature that he didn’t have so much as a passcode on his phone.

He dialled the emergency services and choked out the address, and then sat there clutching Jay’s hand while he waited for the ambulance.

“You’re gonna be okay” he told him, squeezing his hand tightly. His lips were turning blue. “You hear me, Jay? You’re going to be fine.”

***

“Hey.”

Jacob jumped, startled, but it was only Kai.

“Did I call you?” he asked. He really didn’t remember. Everything after the ambulance had arrived was a blurry mess. “I don’t know why. I should have called his agent so she could work some PR magic before this gets plastered all over the tabloids. But, fuck her, you know?”

He was rambling, but Kai nodded anyway as though he understood what Jacob was getting at.

“He’s in critical condition still, but they said he would probably make a full recovery” he added.”

“I know” Kai said. “I spoke with the doctor when I got here.” He swallowed uneasily. “She said that if you hadn’t acted so quickly… How did you do it? I would have frozen up.”

Jacob dropped his gaze down to the ugly hospital linoleum. His tongue was swollen from where he’d been biting on it, and his mouth tasted of iron.

“I did freeze up,” he said, “the first time.” He took a deep breath. “He didn’t make it.”

“Jesus” Kai said. “Who was it?”

“Chris. My older brother.”

“Oh shit, Jacob. I’m so sorry.”

“He was dealing for a long time. Since we were still kids, even. And it got us out of some bad shit, but once we’d made it to the city I thought he’d stop. He got a job bartending, he had a great girlfriend, we finally had a decent apartment – it should have been enough, you know? But he just refused to give it up, and I could never understand why he would risk everything like that, until I realized he was using himself and he didn’t want his supply to dry up. And then he, you know. OD’d.” He cleared his throat awkwardly, tears stinging his eyelids. “Milly – Chris’ ex – she accused me of trying to change what happened, with Jay. Maybe I kind of was.”

“Well. I’m glad you did” Kai said. “Thank you, Jacob. For everything.”

“Oh, fucking hell Kai, don’t thank me. I hardly deserve it” he replied, pressing his fingers into his eyeballs, hard. Coloured lights danced behind his eyelids.

“He wouldn’t be here without you. I’ll never be able to repay you for that.”

“He might not have gotten to that point, if it weren’t for me. Save your thanks for someone better. Please.”

Kai reached over and clasped Jacob’s hand in his own – two identical sets of bruised and bloody knuckles. Strange. He couldn’t remember punching anything.

They sat like that in silence for what seemed like days, even though it must only have been a few hours, tops. Finally, the doctor reappeared to tell them that Jay’s condition was stable.

“You can go see him, for a few minutes” she said. “One at a time, though.”

“You go first” he told Kai, feeling queasy. “I’ll wait out here.”

“You sure?” Kai asked.

“Yeah. Go on.”

He waited until Kai was out of sight, and then walked away: first, down the corridor, and then right out of the hospital. He took a cab back to his apartment and stumbled inside, grabbing all the cash from where he’d stashed it and shoving it along with whatever else he could get his hands on into a backpack. He left a quick voicemail for Milly telling her not to worry, and then switched his phone off so she couldn’t call back, and then he left Ninjago City without so much as a backwards glance.

***

## Epilogue – Five Years Later

The six of them had their own TV show now – the four famous ninja heroes, plus the green ninja and now Kai’s sister as well, apparently.

It was weird seeing Jay on the screen again, after such a long hiatus, and he could only hope the fame was treating him better this time around.

It was even weirder seeing Kai, after the accident. Jacob had heard the news report when he was serving breakfast in the diner, and he’d very nearly dropped the coffee he was carrying in shock. His hands had trembled for the rest of his shift, and eventually his manager had sent him home early.

His injuries had sounded horrific. Back then, people had speculated that he would never be able to walk again – and yet there he was, full of his usual bravado without so much as a limp.

Jacob wondered if he was just faking it for the cameras. He was never as good an actor as Jay, though. Maybe time really did heal all wounds.

Ha.

He was torn out of his musings by an older lady with a scary pink-rinsed beehive clicking her fingers rudely in front of his face.

“Hey, are you working or just watching TV?” she snapped.

He apologised and took her order – one eggs benny with spinach and mushroom, and a glass of OJ.

He went out back to relay this to the kitchen staff. Katerina gave him a wry smile when she saw him. “You are always distracted when the ninja are on the television, yes? I see you through the window in the dining room” she said.

“Um, yeah, I. I’m sorry. I’ll try not to let it happen again” he said, face flushing.

Her smile broadened. “Why don’t you go visit the city one day?” she asked. “Maybe then you get to see them in person, eh?”

He thought of the money he currently had stuffed in his mattress, under the floorboards in his bathroom, rolled up in his left sock.

“Maybe someday I will” he said, and smiled back.

**Author's Note:**

> So, a couple of things I think need to be said about this fic and the Distractions 'verse as a whole.
> 
> The first is that yes, Jay and Kai have absolutely slept together by this point in the fic. Like, multiple times. I'm keeping it vague in the main fic on purpose, because both POV characters like to ignore the fact that it happened, but here is your official Word Of God on the subject - yes.
> 
> The second is that while I was in the process of writing this fic, I came up with this crazy theory that Jacob isn't actually a real person - he's a projection of Kai's subconscious a la Tyler Durden. Because this fic has always really, really wanted to be Fight Club. Chris and Milly are also projections, of Jay and Nya, respectively. Oh also, Kai is the real narrator.
> 
> There are clues hinting at this throughout the story, but I left it deliberately ambiguous. Basically you, the reader, get to decide. Is Jacob a real person? Was he someone Jay brought home once, or was it actually a long-term thing? How much are the events of this fic clouded by Kai's projections, and how much actually happened?


End file.
